Never A Better Time To Share Some Love
Day to day we are waking up not just here in Canberra, but all across the nation, and flipping on the news as we take a sharp inhale in and wonder what we’re going to be asked to do next. For the first time for many of us, news is actually impacting our lives on a huge scale. So it becomes not just something that we can read and feel slightly detached to it as we close the internet tab, but something that’s force shaping our stories like a strong river ripping through a canyon at warp speed.
The change is uncomfortable -to say the least- but while our shakey hands are lifting a cup of peppermint tea to our lips to ease the tension, we have put together some ideas on how best to use the time we’re being asked to take. So whether you’re sitting at your desk and wondering when a mandate will send you home, self isolating at home and trying to un-invite anxiety from your pyjama party, or a combination of the above, let’s take a few moments to outline the silver lining of this rain cloud over us and find the good.
Culture celebrates productivity, but what about mental health?
Oof - this Is a big one, isn’t it? There is that terrible phenomena my best friend has coined, ‘the Sunday Scaries’ to describe that doomsday feeling you get as a 9-5-er between the hours of 2 pm and 11 pm on a Sunday arvo. You know the one: Fri-Yay came and went, leaving you with a slight but non regretful headache on Saturday morning, that was quickly tailed by brunch and relaxation with self or mates. But then Sunday morning rolls in and the exhaustion from the week starts saddling up alongside you. You start to think of all the things you needed to do throughout the week but couldn’t get to with your hours and start regretting the time spent having fun on the previous 2/3rds of your weekend. And then, you’ve arrived at Sunday afternoon only to volley back and forth between guilt of activity: Do I now get things done and tire out what little space to myself I have left, OR do I tear up my to-do list and sit in this hammock, but wallow in guilt whilst I do?
I realise the above is sprinkled with a whole lot of privilege, but it is a scenario so familiar to us all. Perspective for a few seconds will remind us that weekends are for resting, that the average human wasn’t meant to sit in an office or at a desk as long as we’ve made it culturally acceptable to do so, and that what we truly need way more of is not more productivity but more mental health. Still, we know this and then straight away we bathe ourselves in guilt when the societal comparison creeps in and we see everyone else seemingly ticking off to-do lists as an act of ‘restoration’.
I call bullshit.
And don’t get me wrong, I’m terrible at practicing what I preach in this respect. I was raised a hard worker and so infrequently allow myself to rest. But the older I get and the more I’ve got going on, the more I’m learning how rest trumps importance of work and how I can’t do the latter at all without the former.
If we’re asked to work from home or even lessen the amount of hours we’re normally clocking in a public place, this asks us to change our perspective on time and put a few new parameters in place for our lives. Here’s what I’m saying: Let’s take this opportunity to embrace the unsung hero that is rest. Let’s focus internally on how to better use a block of four hours instead of half-assedly always clocking 9. Tuck into curated thoughts of mental health, life, and work, from beautiful platforms like Self Practice, and begin to restructure your priority list. This is our chance to rethink the daily motion.
Time to embrace the slow
Let’s start by hanging with our favourites at Here Wellbeing in Downer over on their new online platform that gives us a bit of breath, space, and peace in this hectic moment. Take that moment.
There was a huge renaissance of this ethos a few years ago with the publishing of great books like Grown & Gathered and awesome podcasts like the Slow Your Home Podcast — in our hectic day to day we as humans are craving some peace. So unthinking the guilt from point one, most of us would admit to ourselves that deep down we’d love a little bit of slow living from time to time.
Even though we’re uncertain about the future of the next six months of work and living for us all, while we wait for news why not embrace the slower pace we’re asked to have?
Amazing yoga studios like Humming Puppy have released a series of FREE online yoga courses so that we’re able to take the time and space for ourselves mentally even when we’re in the casing of our own home. And there’s always the brilliant Yoga with Adriene for some humour, enthusiasm, and great yoga practice to work the stress kinks out of your self isolation.
Get out that cookbook you got for Christmas three years ago and actually spend some time flagging and cooking some new things with what you have stashed away in your pantry (bonus points if you already have Rose Harissa on hand, and you can crack into the amazing Ottolenghi Simple). Everytime your eye starts twitching thinking about all the things you had planned outside of the house, do your best to breathe, make an herbal tea, and embrace the slow.
Support local business
This is a huge one for us… because, obviously, we are a local business In Canberra. All across the nation, Aussies are feeling the effects of the pandemic, but small businesses are feeling it the hardest. Weddings in general have been completely nixed for the forseeable future, so even though we here at Mrs Fray are confident in the future, it does put a big ole’ question mark on the immediate future for our business.
We propose that for small businesses like Mrs Fray and many others local to the Canberra region, there are so many ways to keep our lights on during this uncertain time. Whether it’s now or whenever we might be asked to close our doors mandatorily, you can always support us by purchasing something from OUR ONLINE SHOP (psst- we are currently offering free shipping for purchases made from the comfort of your self isolation!). Or if you’ve been deliberating on locking in your dream dress officially but just waiting on a specific month (and MIRA has been haunting your dreams), making that month now rather than later can keep us going stronger for longer.
Our wonderful next door neighbours at Intra CBR are currently complying with restrictions on their business and have switched a model to accommodate takeaway coffees, food, and wine. In addition to this goodness, the geniuses that they are have created an ONLINE STORE where you can order all the same (that they include free delivery with on orders over $100! So date lunch in for you and yours with wine supply for the week means all this comes to you AND you’re supporting their clever small business). So even when and if hospitality is asked to close completely, we are still able to help their business thrive while the lights are off. It’s a win-win-win-winwinwinwine.
In lieu of making a trip to Woolies, you can order organic produce from great companies like Arc Organics, that are still currently taking orders, and can either deliver to your door or prep a box for a collection at any of their pickup points. If the world starts shutting down in our little part of it, it will be good to be able to help small companies and farmers make ends meet while we do.
Que Sera Sera, so let’s make the most of it.
We understand that if you’re a person who thrives on productivity and checked-off to do lists, then the request to slow things down might not sound like a holiday, but more like a prison. We get the itch and see how easily we could also treat the next few months like a scorn set upon us. But today at Mrs Fray, after writing these words down on paper for our beloved brides, neighbours, friends, and Mrs Frays out there, we realise that it’s just a learning process again and again. Today we write it down so that when the message isn’t quite penetrating, and the stress starts creeping back in, we can read back over it again to help ourselves lean into the motion of slow.
Tuck back into letter writing, buy and eagerly await posted things from artists and creatives across the nation whom you respect (like Annabel Hickson and all her beautiful books on life in Tenterfield, NSW). Tuck into that book pile you meant to read last year, discover what’s kept in the back of your pantry, and enjoy a slow conversation over a pot of tea with whomever you’re sharing air with at home.
It seems that most of this is out of our hands, my loves, so the best thing we can do is what we can do best from behind our screens. Support your local and do it as much as you can virtually. We look forward to meeting you with a smile on the other side and some pretty things to pick up your spirits in the post.
And, as always, we’ll be here every week, dishing out drool worthy content to help give you some pretty things to think about.
Until then, sweet dreams and slow living. x
